Saturday, April 24, 2010

Sons NOT reduced to a crust of bread [Prov6.26]: Training Sons to be Pure in a Pornographic Society

For those who think of pornography as Playboy, there is a culture shock awaiting them. Amateur internet outlets are multiplying at such a rate that commercial pornographers are losing money. When they don't know what to do to solve this problem, it is a serious problem.
The anti-pornography statutes in the United States are tied to local moral standards. The Web honors no local standards. It has no borders. Control has always been at the retail outlets. The retail outlets are now inside the home.
Pornography can be addictive. Unlike most other addictions, Web pornography can be indulged in for no money in complete privacy. There are no immediate negative consequences. As with all addictions, the positive sanctions are front-loaded.
The Web is like having a pusher living at your home. "The first one's free, kid. You'll like it." The rest are free also. And they probably will like it.
So, what is a parent to do?  Here is what I would do.  [keep reading below]

#1.  Discuss this with your sons [especially the addiction aspect. It's seen as harmless. It isn't.]
#2.  Put all computers in a common room, never a private location or bedroom. Simple.
#3.  Do not allow iPhones, iPads, or other Web-access products.   
#4.  Use site-blocking software. It might help a little.
#5.  Use the browser history function to monitor which sites have been accessed.
#6.  With the Web, self-government is the only reliable barrier. Work on this. Technological firewalls will not suffice.
Ask your sons, "If you become dependent on pornography to get aroused, what happens when your wife doesn't look that exciting, which she won't? How fair is that to her?" A wise son will see the connection. (We are not saved by knowledge, however.)
With girls, it's easier to read about hunks than marry one. Getting vicariously seduced is not the same as getting permanently loved.
Pretending that the distribution problem does not exist is ridiculous. The technology is universal and getting cheaper. Pretending that the word "free" is not compelling is even more ridiculous.

-Gary North [abridged]

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